Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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