But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
