When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
