I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
