Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Couch. On fire.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
