Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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