I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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