Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
