so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
They took my balls.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
