He is such a slut. More and more my type.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
