The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
How's work?
Spinning.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
