She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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