I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
