to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
