talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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