Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
