how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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