Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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