Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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