You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
