it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
