I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
