Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
