I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
