I just threw up on my dentist
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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