you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
