Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
