Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
