Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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