Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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