My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Randomize
