don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
