She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
