your thong is hanging out like whoa
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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