wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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