You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
