went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
