well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just gift wrapped bread.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
