I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
