just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
