Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Sry I called you an 8
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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