This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
