you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
