i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
3pm strippers are depressing
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
