matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize