a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
