Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
