I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
