Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
