I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
